natasha

Early this morning I had an encounter with Natasha. Before you get any wild ideas, Natasha is a 2 year old, mostly black, Holstein dairy cow. She is owned by a friend of mine for whom I do some work. In the life of a dairy cow, the first two years she is primarily a "taker". She eats, drinks, and lounges all day. However somewhere around 2 years of age, she transforms from being a taker to being a productive member of the herd. She has a calf and begins to produce milk. Every part of her life becomes more structured in a manner that enhances her health and productivity. Most cows make the transition to a productive life rather easily.

Natasha on the other hand, has not made the transition well. To make matters worse, she has an infection in her udder that needs attention. This morning she cooperated fairly well until I was almost done treating the infection. Suddenly she decided that she wanted to put a hoof imprint on my body. Fortunately for me, I saw it coming and jumped out of the way. Immediately she lashed out again, this time catching her foot in the stall divider. She went berserk, bellowing and hopping up and down in an effort to get her foot loose. I watch her in amusement because I knew that as soon as she quit hopping, her foot would be free. Eventually she managed to free her foot after a great deal of commotion.

Natasha is at a crossroads in her life. If she doesn't soon learn to cooperate with our effort to help her, she may very well find herself at the golden arches in a sesame seed bun right under the lettuce. On the other hand, if she quits resisting the parameters that help her become fruitful, she can expect to live a long and productive life.

As I finished up the morning milking and feeding the cows, I allowed my mind to travel back over the years. I realized that I have seen people just like Natasha. When God invited them to a place of fruitfulness they responded with joy. However, when the discipline necessary for fruitfulness began, they began to lash out. They get their foot caught, increasing their discomfort. They hop, bellow, and blame. In the end, because they never submit to the hand and ways of God, they choose the way of misery and barrenness instead of life and fruitfulness.

What is going to happen to Natasha? Whether she finds herself nestled in cheese and special sauce or whether she will find herself enjoying lush pastures and a comfortable barn will most likely be largely up to her.

dreams and impossibility

Last weekend a group of us were in New York working on the cabin. This whole project has been a series of obstacles to overcome perhaps none bigger than this past weekend. A 2X16 laminated beam, 36 feet long need to go to the very top of the structure. We had no mechanical lift to aid us. There were six of us, 4 men and 2 women. As we surveyed the task in front of us, one of our group declared that he would eat a certain natural fertilizer if we got the beam in place.

Like any obstacle needing to be overcome, a strategy needed to be devised. However the time came to take action. We attached ropes, set ladders and flexed muscles. And then it was time to begin. We got one end partially up on the interior beam. As we worked the beam higher, a series of obstacles began to confront us. The one knot began to slip. Additionally the beam lodged against an interior beam. We found ourselves in a predicament...we couldn't seem to go any higher; we certainly couldn't let it drop due to the danger of damaging both the beam and the existing house structure.

The practical fulfillment of every God-given dream will eventually put us in that kind of place. We are too far into the outworking of the dream too go back without doing damage. However, moving forward seems to be an impossibility as well.

In our predicament with the beam, we took a bit of time, secured it where it was, re-tyed the knot, and strategized some more. As we began to implement our new strategy, suddenly the beam started to move again. Slowly we inched it up and into place only to discover that we had cut the beam wrong; it was too long. Once again we had to determine a course of action. We gathered cords, a saw was taken to the top of the scaffolding and the length was corrected (after 3 attempts). We fastened the beam into place. A great deal of joy ensued. We accomplished what seemed impossible several hours before.

And so it is with the unfolding of dreams. Impossibility faces us at every turn. Obstacles stare us in the face. At the point of those obstacles, we can shrink back in fear, immobilized by the immensity of the task ahead of us. Or we can take charge of the situation, imposing God's grace and our will on the situation instead of being controlled by it.

Oh and the member of our group who promised to eat that natural fertilizer, well we chose to not hold him to his words. However, he did have to endure a great deal of good-natured banter.

Ethan

Ethan was part of our worship service on Sunday. Ethan is young, energetic, and full of life. He has also been diagnosed with autism. On Sunday, the drums fascinated him as the music played. Several times his mother caught him as he headed for the drummer and the drums. I think that probably his presence and behavior caused a bit of discomfort in those of us present.

I really don't think that the problem was Ethan. I think there is an underlying issue with Ethan in the worship service and his presence underscored the issue. You see - I want my relationship with both God and people to be neat and tidy, not messy and out of control. I subconsciously create a belief system, a theology, that is precise, in control, and measurable. I like lines and definition - this is in and this is out. I like linear - in an hour I know what I will be doing. I want to know exactly what time the service will be over and what time the race or the baseball game starts. Anything that disrupts my neat, managed, controlled relationship with either God or people causes me discomfort.

Yet when I read the gospels and the account of Jesus life, it seems as if He was (and is) anything but predictable. Not only was He unpredictable, His life was filled with interruptions and chaos. In the midst of a deep theological discussion about divorce with the religious leaders, the children interrupt. At a dinner party in the house of another religious leader, a woman of the street crashes the party. She begins to weep, her tears washing over Jesus feet. She takes her hair, drys His feet, kisses them and puts a fragrant lotion on them. On His way to heal the daughter of the leader of a local synagogue, an unclean woman pushes her way through the crowd to touch Jesus' robe for her healing. As Jesus spends time with her, word comes that it was too late. The girl He was going to heal had died.

Jesus was constantly surrounded by people whose lives were anything but neat and tidy. Blind beggars loudly cried out to be healed. Demons shrieked with terror. A desperate woman would not leave until her daughter was healed. Even His disciples were anything but neat. One was a thief, several were hotheads (the sons of thunder), one was a terrorist, and one was a traitor.

Beyond that, Jesus Himself defies a neat description. He made wine for a bunch of drunk wedding guests. He spit in a man's eyes to heal him. With another man, Jesus put His fingers in the man's ears, spit and touched his tongue. Another time Jesus makes mud with the dust and his saliva and puts the mud on a man's blind eyes.

When I compare the actions of Jesus and His relationship with people to my paradigm of a nice neat God working through nice neat people in a nice neat church, I find almost no similarities. As I have pondered Ethan and his presence in our worship service this week, I have wondered if he was not sent from God, a prophet if you will, to point out my own (and others) self made God paradigms that far from the reality of God.

finding God in the mundane

I've not disappeared or fallen off the face of the earth! The past several weeks have been very full. I've spent a good deal of time at our place in NY building our cabin. The physical labor has given me time to think about God, His work in the world today, and about our role in it.

I've had several conversations recently that stirred my thought process. I believe that we make walking with God far too impractical and ethereal. I am convinced that all of our life is spiritual, that if God is not found in the mundane details of our life, then we are missing the point.

A friend of mine told me of an acquaintance of his. This acquaintance had spent all his life waiting for God to do something big with his life. Now at the end of his life, he wonders if perhaps he missed God. A young man told me that he desires to do something significant for God. He is frustrated by his work. In his mind it limits his possibility of doing something significant. It seems unspiritual and disconnected with God.

We fall into a trap of assuming that the significant things God has for us will somehow propel us into a more spiritual realm. In our desire for spirituality we miss the work of God in the mundane ordinary events of life. We have bills to pay, children to raise, and grass to mow. We separate these things from God, compartmentalizing our life into our God life and then our mundane life.

To compartmentalize our life in this manner causes us to miss God completely simply because He will appear in the ordinary. The religious leaders of Jesus' day missed the Messiah. He appeared too un-Messiah like. He was rather ordinary, born out of wedlock, and in general did not meet their expectations of the Messiah.

In the same way today, the work of God is far more practical, far more earthy than we may want to admit. The original command for Adam was to subdue the earth. God never rescinded that command. Our responsibility remains to subdue the earth, to accomplish the work of God in making the earth fruitful. That doesn't sound very spiritual at all.

Yet it is in the mundane things that we find God. It is the work of God to raise our children, to change diapers, to go to work, and to pay our bills. I find God in my work, as I labor in building a cabin, as I relate to my children. If I separate my "God-life" from my everyday life, then I will miss the point! Find God in the mundane and you will discover life.

my kids and crisis

I am so proud of my kids! Okay...so maybe I am biased. However this week I watched both Heidi and Karisa face crisis and handle it well.

Heidi graduated this spring with a special ed/elementary ed degree. She will work for the Philadelphia School district. On Wednesday she had a meeting in center Philadelphia at the district office to get her placement. When she got there, she was informed that they were placing her in a high school special ed position. In her words - "I had a moment". She has no experience or education dealing with high school students.

Here is where I am so proud of her. After a bit of panic and several phone calls, she arrived at the point where she assumed that God must want her in this specific high school. In spite of her fear, she began to look for the opportunities...maybe she could help coach a girls soccer team...maybe God had something that she did not see yet.

The next day she got called in for a second meeting. At that meeting they reassigned her to a K-4 school where she will teach in an elementary class!

Karisa spent three weeks in India. Her arrival date back in the states was this past Friday, the 17th. The beginning of the week she called us to tell us that she may not be able to get out of the mountains. There was a good deal of political unrest and there was an indefinite strike. In that part of the world, a strike shuts down all transportation, businesses, and markets. In other words, life comes to a standstill. Her response to the strike was that if God wanted her to stay indefinitely, then she would do so.

Incidentally, an influential leader in the town pulled some strings and she got to Delhi on Thursday and we picked her up in Newark on Friday!

Both girls faced crisis. Both responded the same way. After the initial fear and panic, they immediately began to look for the hand God. Both were fully aware the God orders their steps, that He is good, and that He could be trusted with their future.

If we are going to partner with God in his redemptive and transformative work, we must have this kind of attitude. Obstacles become opportunities. We look for the hand of God in the midst of crisis. (Crisis is our perspective not God's.) We must be fully aware of God's goodness. In spite of our emotions we act from the perspective that God is good, that He knows better than I do.

cool and cutting edge?

I recently heard of a young couple who left their church to attend another church that had better children's ministry. That got me started thinking about following Jesus and about the church. For the past twenty years I have been involved with church planting in one capacity or another. For years the "experts" stressed a high quality children's ministry, a really cool youth ministry, and a high energy adult service with cutting edge "worship" as the best way to grow a church rapidly. And you know what? It really did work!

Yet I am wondering if perhaps we didn't miss something. We have created a generation of church attenders that are little more than consumers. Church is the commodity and we attempt to entice them with the promise of a superior product. We have dynamic ministry programs! We are the coolest! (Well...we wouldn't say so but deep inside that it is what we think.) Our kids ministry rocks! And so we present church as a commodity that adds value to your life or to your kid's lives.

I am not sure that Jesus was cool...or cutting edge. We do read of His children's ministry - He took time in the midst of an all important discourse about divorce to hold and bless the children. He didn't mind the interuption. In fact, He became angry with those who attempted to shoo the children away. I can't really find any cool ministry programs He instituted. Jesus did heal the sick, give the sinners hope, and proclaimed the good news that the realm of God was here on earth now.

Might it be that we have substituted dynamic programs for the power of God? Might it be that the kingdom of God is not about cool or cutting edge? Are we simply entertaining and being entertained, seeing who can draw the largest crowd? Where is the power to heal the sick? Where is the power to transfrom lives and bring wholeness?

false realities

In light of my post about Barney Frank, Freddie Mac, and Fannie Mae, I thought it may be helpful to post something that I wrote some time ago. I am not sure if I ever posted this before. If I did I apologize!

For the past several years, God has been inviting Bev and me to participate with Him in His restorative work in the lives of individuals. It is hard to imagine a greater joy than seeing wholeness come to individuals, to see a life characterized by wreckage be transformed into wholeness. In our interaction with people who need restored, we noticed one constant theme that led to their personal destruction. In every circumstance, a false reality paved the way for destructive behavior to emerge.

I would define a false reality as the creation of a perception or a belief system not based on truth. It is the embracing of any thought process that does not align with reality as defined by God and therefore does not align itself with truth. It is the denial of what really is (true reality), choosing instead to believe and live according to a mindset or thought pattern created to justify or validate certain behaviors. For instance, an alcoholic will insist he can control his drinking or that he can stop drinking whenever he so chooses. The actuality of the situation is that there is no way he can stop without intervention outside of himself. However, he stubbornly clings to the lie that he can control his drinking. That false reality allows the power of alcohol to strengthen its grip in his life. No amount of insistence about the veracity of a false reality will cause the deception to be true.

Most of the restorative situations with which Bev and I work are people who would consider themselves as followers of Jesus. We have made a particularly disturbing discovery about their false realities – initially they have willingly engaged in their specific deception. Rather than seeking and choosing truth, God’s reality, they chose to either create or engage in a false reality because it was more convenient. They embraced a thought pattern that appealed to their base nature, to their “self-god”.

In almost every instance, people needing restoration have asked “How did we get here?” The creation of these false realities have simultaneously created and strengthened the deception. Not only does the creation of a false reality facilitate deception, it concurrently strengthens the deception and gives birth to new false realities. The vicious cycle opens the door for destruction and wreckage to occur.

Prior to people choosing to engage in the initial deception, there is another underlying condition that gives rise to the vulnerability toward accepting and creating false realities. The most essential nature of humanity is that we are created as a spirit being. God “breathed” and His image was imparted to Adam. We frequently call this spirit component of our being our heart. It is the heart that is born from above through Christ. It is the heart that is joined in union with God. The spirit is overtaken by Him becoming one with Him. As such, this union becomes our center, the source of true life. Everything that pertains to life, to godliness, and to wisdom flows from our union with God in our heart.

The self-god, which is centered in the realm of the intellect and the emotions, violently opposes our spiritual union with God. The self-god attempts to entice each of us to abandon living from our union with God and draws us to engaging in our intellect and emotions as our sole source of life and wisdom.

In our experience, every person purposefully engaging in a false reality was prepared to receive that reality when they turned from living from their union with God to living from intellect and emotions. Universally, people caught in destructive behaviors have no idea what God is saying about them, about who they are or about their situation. That ignorance is not a result of the destructive behavior; rather the ignorance creates the conditions for the destructive behavior to take root.

Ultimately, the way to keep from being entangled by false realities is by guarding our heart. We must continually keep the place of our oneness with God as the center that determines our actions. God frequently invites us to live in ways that feel dangerous to our intellect and emotions. At the point of that invitation, we choose whether we will live according to God’s reality or whether we will open the door to the possibility of engaging in false realities because we are choosing to live according to the self-god.

We must ruthlessly oppose the self-god and its desires, choosing the way of the cross. We must take an honest look at our thought processes, realizing our predisposition to deception apart from Christ. For the past number of years, I have asked God to judge me, to judge my motives, to reveal reality and truth. The result of that prayer is that I am confronted regularly with the choice of either embracing my definition of reality or choosing to embrace the Father’s definition. God has taken aim at my motives and perceptions so frequently that it seems to me that He is my enemy much of the time.

Yet I am fully aware that the judgment of God springs from His incredible love toward me. I am also deeply aware of my own vulnerability to perceptions that lead to destruction. Therefore the only safe path is the reality as defined by God, regardless of how painful or difficult it seems to me. Not only is reality as defined by God a place of safety, living according to His reality leads to abundant life.